Unexpected Encounters with Sexism

 Yesterday afternoon I ended up twisting my ankle pretty badly while playing basketball. The perks of this were that I got to sit in bed, browsing the internet all day today without feeling guilty about it. The bad news is that I have to make up the three classes I missed today (no substitute teachers in China) and that if I have to hear one more person connect my injury with my gender, I swear to Jesus, Mary and Joseph that I will lose it.

I've been living in China for over three months now and have visited here many times before, but this is the first time that I've encountered sexism so blatantly. Of course I knew that it existed in China. Here at my college, my English majors are made up almost completely of women, and the engineering and math majors are largely male. One of my male friends was taking part in an English speech tournament and told me without shame that “boys usually get special treatment because there are less of them.” My own students will casually perpetuate sexist ideas. In many of our class discussions, I have come to understand that it is the male who is expected to buy the house, hold down a job, buy a car, and support the family. The women, on the other hand, usually gets a few years in the workforce after college before settling down and having a child by (at the latest) 30 years old. This is, of course, a terrible situation for both sexes—men are under huge pressure to be the providers for the family, and women have almost no choice but to get married and become a stay at home mom.

Anyhow, I'm getting sidetracked. I am plenty aware that sexism exists in China, but this is the first time that it has been applied directly to me. I have been spoiled in so many ways as a visitor here, and my Western label serves as a pass for many Chinese cultural norms. In China, women tend not to drink, go out to bars, or work out a lot. They also don't wear shirts that reveal their collarbones or shoulders. As a foreigner, I get to bypass all that and am for the most part free to stick to my familiar Western etiquette. Since twisting my ankle, however, I have received countless seemingly harmless comments. Let me list a few:

“Girls need to be more careful when they play basketball.”

“You probably shouldn't have been playing with boys, they are more rough.”

“Be more careful, girls are weaker than boys.”

“You need to go to the gym more to strengthen your legs so you won't get hurt.”

The last comment in particular irked me because since coming to China, I have been working out almost every day (more than most of the male teachers or students I know), and have been very proud of how strong and fit I've become.

But apparently, if I'm a girl, I must only be going to the gym to watch the strong, muscly men at work.

China is a fascinating, captivating place, but sometimes I forget that it is still, in many ways, a developing country. Sexism can seem like a relatively harmless thing when it's just an idea, but suddenly when it affects you personally, it becomes very real, and incredibly infuriating.